Selfish? When in a dying marriage can one be too selfish?

I am in some bum**** town with my husband and daughter for the next few days.  I'm here because its better than being at home with my inlaw who I guess now is going to be living with us ( the rude shit) from now on.  I told my spouse this morning that I would take the baby to the movies rather than sit in the hotel all day long.  And what does he say to me?  No, don't go i want to go with you guys too.  So, I wait the entire day get made up just for him (which was a waste of my freakin time) and we wait from 8-5 and when he gets off he wants to go to the 5 star dining of Applebee's.  Ok, then he insists that we order it to go because he's tired and wants to go back to the hotel.  I say no, that the baby and I have been in the hotel all damn day, and I am want to be around some people.  So, we compromise with with just appetitizers and our entrees will be to go.  Of course when we get back to the hotel and he changes in to his pj's I know we're in for the night, and when I mention to him later that I knew he wasn't going to take us to the movies, he goes off and proclaims I am selfish, and i should have sympathy for him since he worked all day.  Its always this bullshit about I worked all day.  Like I have never worked a ficking job in my life and I should just act as though going to a job is all that life should consist of.  I am with a willful, zealous, defiant, loving, mishceivous, beautiful toddler day in and day out, and as much as I want to smother our child with love and attention every minute I am around her, its just not possible.  Its a constant of "stop, put that down, don't do that, I said NO, come back here". And in the 2 hours my husband is around our child they play constantly, absolutely no discipline, and then has the nerve to complain i am not affectionate enough after I have had my fill of naughty behavior.  Funny enough he has been doing this thing where when I speak to him he tunes me out, often ignoring what I say, or pretending he's attending to our child, or completely focusing directly and solely on the child and becomes unresponsive to what I say.  I have began to become more quiet.  I have began to withdraw and make less comments. Strike up less conversations.  I see no point.  He'll either ignore me, put me down, say its irrelevant, say my points are stupid or nonsense, so I don't even bother.  Sometimes, I forget I pray for a glimmer of hope that he'll even notice my hair, or try to be attentive to my pregnancy.  His actions tell me he has checked out of this relationship.  It seems to me he's emotionally moved on to another one.  It doesn't matter how much i cry, or show emotion he simply doesn't care.  I wish I could tune out too, but being around him makes it so very hard.  Usually when i ended past relationships, I change my number, avoid certain places they frequent, and alter my routine.  But, when I want to do things for myself, and then give him the benefit of the doubt that backfires on me.  I mentioned to him today to remind his nephew about the trash, and have it taken out while we are gone, he tells me to call him myself.  Again this is a 30 year old man living in our home, and I have to endure him ignoring me, doesn't acknowledge my presence when I enter my home, ugh.  I really give up this is bullshit.  Why am I even try. Its mind over matter.  I can't let them do to me what they did before.  I will just pray and God will work all this out for me.  Because I do not have the emotional strength to want to do this alone anymore.