Strengthen the body and mind

Yesterday I was so distraught after the incident with my spouse that I could barely focus. I called my sister because I had no one else to turn to. She gave me a verbal tongue lashing. But not in the sense of abusive, I mean in the sense of a wake up call. She told me I've been relying on the sentiment that this bastard will change and that he will once again treat me well. She told me he's been playing me for a fool, and has gotten away with not having to care for his children properly, not paying their medical expenses, not buying them clothes, not having any celebration for them, and the more he yells, and refuses to do for them, I find a way to fix it, never holding him accountable for anything. She essentially told me I have been mentally weak, and rather than use logic, I needed to use guile and intellect, which I fear I do not have. I never thought I would have to use cunning, lies, and deceat to be in a marriage. But, I realize now from day one that he'd been playing me all along. He didn't want to pay his share of the hotel balance for the wedding for he claimed he'd maxed out his credit card a week before the balance was due, forcing my parents to pay for it to save face from canceling the wedding, when I begged and pleaded for him to get the kids insurance, he refused and I was forced to apply for Medicaid. When time came for school enrollment, I was forced to register my kids at a school I hate because I could convince him to send them elsewhere. Each night he return home at 8:00 not allowing me to work, and he gets away with it. So, how could I be so stupid, and what would make me feel better? I went to the gym. For the first time in 3 years, I worked out and forgot all my problems. I forgot about the IRS. I forgot about how badly I want a divorce. I forgot about how miserable and stupid I am. I worked out. I did a cardio class and it kicked ass. I did the treadmill and watched TV and I felt fantastic. I came home looked at my children, and for once wasn't overwhelmed with grief and anguish over my situation.